‘I must remember to breathe’

These were the words I said to my manager in the middle of the COVID-19 peak. I was feeling the full impact of the pandemic on the care home residents my team and myself were looking after. The reality of the crisis was unfolding, and never in my 26 years as a registered nurse had I experienced such tragedy and despair.

Our integrated care home service provides a rapid response for care homes in the event of a resident becoming unwell. It also provides proactive support through teaching and training of care home staff. The team is well established, so we share a trusting and collaborative relationship with local homes—even though we work for the NHS and they, for the care sector.

In early March 2020, we felt a real sense of uncertainty and anxiety, having seen the situation in China and then Italy (Safi et al, 2020). As a team, we did not feel prepared. On reflection, this must have been nothing compared to what care home colleagues were feeling. National action plans were being made to ‘protect the NHS’ (Department of Health and Social Care, 2020), but our colleagues in the care sector were struggling for any resemblance of the same leadership and support, being falsely reassured by the Government that it was ‘very unlikely’ the virus would infect residents of care homes (Public Health England, 2020).